All Now Mysterious...

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

In Which I Lament the State of the Republican Party in2016

The problem with the Republican Party today is that there really isn't one. George Will is quoted as saying, "I don't belong to an organized political party. I'm a Democrat." Amusing as that sentiment is, it's more literally true of the GOP today.

The Republican Party isn't really a single entity with a unifying vision and platform. It is instead a loosely-organized coalition of competing and often internally contradictory factions. They are, to borrow from Battlestar Galactica, a ragtag, fugitive fleet, on a voyage to they-know-not-where. Meanwhile, Republican leaders are forced to pander to as many of these splintered factions as possible in order to get anything done. Republicans squabble amongst themselves almost as often as they squabble with Democrats.

Among the factions currently claiming affiliation with the GOP: the Gun Rights faction, the Anti-immigration faction, the Rich White Folks faction (Hillary Clinton notwithstanding), the Shouting Evangelical faction, the Get The Gummit Outta My Life faction, the Anti-Islam faction, the I'm-Mad-As-Hell-And-I'm-Not-Gonna-Take-It-Anymore faction, the Obstructionist Tea Party faction, the Anti-Vax/Climate Change Denial/Anti-Science faction, the Anti-Common Core/Pro-Homeschool faction, and maybe, somewhere in all of that, a few actual Reagan-era conservatives. These vastly disparate groups are united (if that's the right word) by just one thing: for one reason or another, they all dislike President Obama and/or Secretary Clinton.

That's no way to win an election. (See 'Kerry, John' for details.) There's no way any one candidate--or even any one Presidential/VP ticket--can hope to satisfy all of those factions. 

The Republicans have lost the last two Presidential elections--and if you ask me, they're on track to lose the next two--because  the Party no longer has any idea who the Hell they are or what they stand for. All they know is what they're against.

For my money, the 2016 Presidential election is already lost. Dysfunctional as the Democratic Party might be at the moment, nobody seriously doubts that the rank and file will eventually fall in line behind Hillary Clinton in November. As much as Democrats might dislike Clinton, they're not going to vote for Trump instead. Meanwhile, Utah, arguably the reddest of the Red States, is currently polling Trump at 29%, Clinton at 27%, and Libertarian Gary Johnson at 26%. Statistically , it's a dead heat. If, as a Republican, you can't win Utah convincingly, what chance do you have of winning the nation?

I expect that there will still be a Republican Party after November, but I have no idea what it will look like. But the GOP can't go like this much longer. Eventually, the Party is going to implode.

With luck, it'll be sooner rather than later. The sooner it happens, the more time the Party will have to figure out what the Hell it wants to be. They'd better get working on that quickly. It's only four years until the next election....

Sunday, May 22, 2016

Yearbook Fortune Cookies

One of my fellow teachers refuses to sign student yearbooks. She says there just aren't that many ways to say "I enjoyed having you in my class this year" (a sentiment that isn't even true in some cases) and "Have a great summer". So she prints up an inspirational poem or short story and hands that out instead.

Another teacher I know draws a sketch instead of signing yearbooks. He's a lot more talented than I am, in that respect. I could sketch different molecules, I suppose, but just how many aromatic rings can one draw before the novelty wears off?

So this year, instead of signing yearbooks in the traditional fashion, I've assembled a list that I affectionately call "Yearbook Fortune Cookies". I'm going to roll a d12 and write whichever quote comes up from the list. Here they are:

1  If you know immediately that candlelight is fire, then the meal was cooked a long time ago.

2  Understanding is a three-edged sword.

3  Deserve victory.

4  Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so.

5  A brave man likes the feel of nature upon his face, but a wise man has the sense to come in from the rain.

6  The heart is not so easily changed, but the head can be persuaded.

7  If you seek meaning, then listen to the music, not the song.

8  Even a mirror will not show you yourself, if you do not wish to see.

9  You don’t have to leave to find a better view.

10  Life is the future, not the past.

11  The point of a journey is not to arrive.

12  You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

I'm hoping I roll '1' a lot. ::evil grin::

Monday, May 09, 2016

End of Year Report

Writer J. Michael Straczynski, borrowing from Robert Heinlein, discusses the following metaphor:

“If you are trapped high in a burning building, you are eventually left with one of two options. You can stay where you are and perish in the fire, or you can jump and buy yourself a few more seconds to figure out what to do next.  The former spells certain doom; the latter provides at least the possibility of hope.”

I feel like I’ve spent a lot of time this year jumping out of burning buildings.

In retrospect, the decision to implement Canvas more fully as a content delivery and assessment system, while simultaneously moving full time to a new electronic textbook, was probably too ambitious.  Despite preparations I made over the summer, I feel like I spent the entire year trying to catch up. Everything took longer than expected to implement—the fact that we didn’t have the promised access to the e-book for the first month or six weeks of school certainly didn’t help—and pacing suffered.  There was a fair amount of material that I simply ran out of time to cover.  SAGE Summative results will probably reveal this in detail.

If I had it to do over again, I would probably move forward with Canvas first, using the textbook we’ve used in previous years.  However, having made it this far, I feel I’m in a good position to implement both the e-textbook and Canvas more effectively next year.  The groundwork has been laid; the infrastructure is, for the most part, now in place. I can spend my planning time next year revising instead of inventing.

Friday, April 15, 2016

Why I Teach Science

“How does this thing work? Why does that stuff change? How does that do what it just did?”
-Introduction, Sid the Science Kid
I have a 6 year old daughter and a 2½ year old son. It is a daily adventure watching them discover the world around them. They are so curious about their little universe, so passionate about exploring their surroundings, and so thrilled when they learn something new or figure something out for themselves. They have such joy in discovery.

Science should be like that for everybody.

I have spent the past seven years teaching chemistry at Olympus High School in Salt Lake City.  I have had the opportunity to work with many, many great students.  I have known that most of them would not pursue a career in the sciences.  But I have tried to help them each to cultivate an appreciation for the wonder of our world and the joy that comes from curiosity and discovery.  These are traits that transcend the discipline of science; I believe they are a natural part of a well-balanced life.

I love science because I love learning and discovering new things about the world we live in.  I teach science because I love seeing my students have that same experience.

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Free Eats!

Here’s one good reason that everyone should learn how to cook: Freedom.

If you can’t cook, you are dependent upon someone else for one of the necessities of life.  Every time you need or want to eat, you are going to have to pay someone—fiscally or otherwise—to provide food for you.  And you may not even get quite what you want. You’ll get someone else’s interpretation of what they think you want.

But if you can cook, the power is yours. You can make yourself whatever you want, whenever you want.  You are not reliant on anyone else’s time or resources or availability.  You are responsible, and accountable only to yourself, for your own nutrition.  You are independent.

Declare your independence by learning to cook.

Saturday, January 02, 2016


Everybody wants the most they can possibly get
For the least they can possibly do....
-Todd Snider, "Easy Money"

When I was a chemistry student at the University of Utah, we got an earful about academic honesty. This wasn't a coincidence; the Chemistry department had been at the epicenter of Cold Fusion, arguably the biggest scientific scam/gaffe of the 20th century.  A lot of people lost their jobs and the university and the department took huge hits in credibility over the incident. Those who remembered the incident wanted to make sure we knew better than to try to pass off questionable, manufactured, or inflated results ourselves.  They wanted to make sure we knew how the scientific process was really supposed to work.

As a teacher, I focus on academic honesty as well. I have a lengthy description of the policy, and the consequences of violating it, in my classroom disclosure statement that students and parents get at the beginning of the year. But the policy and its consequences are actually pretty simple: The expectation is that you will do your own work, and if you don't do your own work, then you don't get credit for it.

It's kind of a game, really, the interplay between students and teachers.  Students try to earn the highest possible grade with the least possible work, while teachers try to catch students when, not if, they cheat.  It's all part of the dance.

This year I have a student in one of my classes; I will call him X.  After I had handed back and gone over each of the two exams in first quarter, X came up and asked for clarification on his grade, claiming that I had not given him full credit for correct answers on some questions. The first time, I didn't think much of it.  I make mistakes sometimes. The second time, however, I began to be suspicious.  You see, when I grade exams, I mark them in a certain way based on what information is or is not provided.  That way, I know if, and to some extent, how a student has answered a problem.  And X was claiming to have included, and not received credit for, information that my grading system told me hadn't been there originally.

There is, I am told, a saying in the military: One time is luck, two times is coincidence, but three times is enemy action. So for the third exam, I decided to see what was really going on. I made a photocopy of X's test before I graded it.

Sure enough, after passing back the test and going over it in class, he came up and wanted to know why he hadn't received full credit on some questions.  I told him I'd look at it and took back the test.

When I compared the test he gave me back with the photocopy I had made earlier, I discovered two different answers that had been changed in an attempt to gain more points.

According to my classroom policy as outlined in the disclosure, the consequence of academic dishonesty is a grade of zero on the test, lab, or assignment in question. X failed the test anyway; he had scored 27/50 and was trying to get me to raise it to 31/50. But because of his cheating, his grade is now 0/50. And under my published classroom policy, he cannot make up or retake the test--because he was caught cheating.

The last thing I did before leaving school for the two week winter break was to change his test grade to zero and send a letter to his parents explaining why the grade had been changed.

X is in the first class I have on Monday morning.  It will be interesting to see what the fallout is going to be.

New Years Soup

Happy New Year, Everyone! I hope 2016 brings you all peace, joy, and happiness.

For our New Year's Eve family get-together, I made soup. I found the recipe via Facebook at a website called 12 Tomatoes. Here's a link:

Slow Cooker Loaded Baked Potato Soup

I did make one change to the recipe, Instead of using cream cheese, I substituted sour cream to make it a little less rich. Also, I only used about 1/3 cup of bacon, because that's what we had. All in all, it worked out nicely.

Anyway, here is the recipe as I made it. I highly recommend it!

32 oz. frozen hash browns
32 fl. oz. (1 qt.) chicken broth
1 can (10 oz.) condensed cream of chicken soup
8 oz. sour cream
1 1/2 cup sharp cheddar cheese, grated
1/3 cup crumbled bacon

Add all ingredients to a large slow cooker; mix well.  Cook on high for 3-4 hours.  Serve with salt and pepper, rosemary, chives, etc. to taste.  Serves 8-12.


Friday, December 04, 2015

Siri, Siri, Siri....

I was just issued a new iPad Air at work, and the assistant IT guy (a former student) came by to help me set it up.  He introduced me to Siri.  This has led to a few amusing Q&As.

Me: Who's on first?
Siri: That's right. Who is on first.

Me: What is the meaning of life?
Siri: I don't believe there's a consensus on that question.

Me: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?
Siri: The last person who asked me that ended up in a crevasse.

Who says programmers don't have a sense of humor?