Today's E-Mail Treasure

 I got this e-mail from the parent of one of my new students today:

Hi Sir, 

Help me understand what transpired today that you refused to allow my student {name redacted} into your classroom. 

My response:

He arrived late to class, so the door was shut while we completed the starter activity. There was a sign on the door that asked him to wait 5 to 7 minutes to be admitted once the starter was complete. When I opened the door, he was gone.

I feel like this should resolve the issue.

I also feel about 67% confident that I have not heard the last from this parent on the issue.

But I've been wrong before. I could get lucky.

But next week is Parent Teacher Conferences, so....

The Dog and the Scorpion

 Once upon a time a dog was walking along the bank of a river, looking for a good place to swim across. As he entered the water, he heard a voice nearby. "Hey, can I ride on your back across the river? I need to get over there too."

The dog looked around until he found the source of the voice. It was a scorpion.

"Absolutely not," the dog replied. "If I let you onto my back, you'll sting me along the way and I'll drown."

"No I won't," the scorpion retorted. "Why would I do that? I would drown, too. That wouldn't make sense. Here, just help me across. Everything will be fine."

They talked for a few moments and eventually, against his better judgment, the dog was persuaded to allow the scorpion to climb into his back. They entered the river and quickly made their way across.

Then, just as the dog started to climb out of the water, the scorpion stung him.

Feeling the venom spread.through his body, the dog could only watch as the scorpion easily jumped to shore. "Why?" the dog cried. "Why would you do this? I helped you!"

The scorpion just shrugged. "You knew what I was when you let me climb on your back." And the dog sank beneath the water while the scorpion went on with his day.

It's Just A Joke

 A man in Moscow walks up to a newsstand one morning and says, "One copy of Pravda, please." The stand keeper takes his money and gives him the paper. The man then scrutinizes the front page and then throws the paper away.

The man comes back to the newsstand again the next morning and again buys a copy of Pravda. Again he reads only the front page and throws the newspaper away. He does the same for eight more days.

On the eleventh morning when he buys his paper, the stand keeper's curiosity get the best of him. He asks him, "What are you doing? Why do you read only the front page and then throw the newspaper away?"

The man replies, "I am looking for the obituaries."

The stand keeper tells him, "Comrade, the obituaries are not on the front page."

The man just smiles. "The one I'm looking for will be "