The Wisdom of Jimmy John's

We stopped by the Fort Union location of Jimmy John's Gourmet Sandwiches for lunch the other day. Besides great sandwiches, the restaurant features fun signs on the walls. One of these had the following, which I am almost certainly going to post in my classroom next month.

--

* Food for Thought *

Here's some awesome advice once offered to high school students by the founder of a ridiculously successful software company.

~ Rule 1 ~
Life is not fair—get used to it!

~ Rule 2 ~
The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself.

~ Rule 3 ~
You will not make $50,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

~ Rule 4 ~
If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

~ Rule 5 ~
Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping. They called it opportunity.

~ Rule 6 ~
If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault. So don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

~ Rule 7 ~
Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes, and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forests from the parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

~ Rule 8 ~
Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as many times as you need to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to anything in the real world.

~ Rule 9 ~
Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.

~ Rule 10 ~
Television is not real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

~ Rule 11 ~
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.


--

They also had this sign, which will not be posted in my classroom. I just thought it was funny.



Did I mention that they also had tasty sandwiches? And chips?

--

Edit: I have since been informed that the list above does not come from Bill Gates, as verified by Snopes.com. I have added the proper attribution below:

Sykes, C. J. (1995) Dumbing down our kids: Why America's children feel good about themselves but can't read, write, or add. New York: St. Martin's Press.

From the Hero Boards

In a recent Hero Games Discussion Boards thread about the Harry Potter books and movies, the conversation turned to Dolores Umbridge. The question was raised as to whether she was ever actually a Death Eater, or whether she just sympathized with their goals (and methods). A poster named garou made this comment:

"I've always operated under the presumption that the Death Eaters thought about recruiting her, and refused to do so, on the grounds that although they may be murderous, black-hearted SOBS, there are some lines a Death Eater simply won't cross."

I had to laugh.

Pic of the Week: My New School

That's right: I got the job!

Details tomorrow.

Swine Flu Alert!

If you receive an e-mail from the Department of Health telling you not to eat canned pork because of swine flu............


Ignore it.


It's just Spam.

Tuesday Tunes: Week 93

Brought to you, as always, by The Music Memoirs.

It's time for another word association episode of Tuesday Tunes!
Remember, tell us the first song/band/artist/album that comes to mind when you see these words:

School: "School Boy Heart" by Jimmy Buffett
I got a school boy heart, a novelist eye
Stout sailor's legs and a license to fly

End: "At the End of the Day" by Spock's Beard
At the end of the day
It's what you do not what you say
At the end of the day
You'll be fine

Trip: "Jamaica Farewell" by Harry Belafonte
Down the way where the nights are gay
And the sun shines daily on the mountain top
I took a trip on a sailing ship
And when I reached Jamaica I made a stop

Letter: "In Your Letter" by REO Speedwagon
In your letter you said you didn't love me
You said you're gonna leave me
But you could've said it better

Drink: "Alcohol" by Brad Paisley
'Cause since the day I left Milwaukee
Lynchburg and Bordeaux France
Been making a fool out of folks just like you
And helping white people dance
I'm medicine and I am poison
I can help you up or make you fall
You had some of the best times
You'll never remember with me—Alcohol

Relax: "Stop Showing Up In My Dreams" by Amy Rigby
A big busload of Japanese, the gay geisha review
I bowed to them when they checked in, it made me think of you
You never call, never write, never even fax
They moved me to the boiler room, so how can I relax?
I'm pegging every meter
I'm building up the steam
But this thing is gonna blow
If you don't stop showing up in my dreams

Age: "End of the Age" by Kansas
For the sand in the hourglass is falling
We hang in the balance one by one
Turn from you ways the voice is calling
And fear the end of the age

Baby: "Don't Worry Baby" by the Beach Boys
But she looks in my eyes
And makes me realize
And she says
Don't worry baby
Everything will turn out all right

Find: "Love Will Find a Way" by Yes
Here is my heart
Waiting for you
Here is my soul
I eat at chez nous
Love will find a way
If you want it to
Love will find a way
Love will find a way for me and you

Symphony: "Good Morning Baltimore" from the musical Hairspray
Good morning Baltimore
Every day's like an open door
Every night is a fantasy
Every sound's like a symphony

The Long and Winding Road, Part II

Note: If you haven't read Part I of the story, you'll obviously want to do that first. -M

--

So now I had a mission: To submit the paperwork for the Alternative Route to Licensure (ARL) and begin seeking a job in education in earnest. It took a couple of weeks to get everything together. It wasn't a difficult process, but the expense was nontrivial, considering I'm effectively unemployed. I had to submit an application for a criminal background check ($69), after which I was directed to a local school district office for fingerprinting ($10). From there I just had to download and fill out the application form and mail it to the State with an official copy of my college transcripts ($5) and the processing fee ($50). Within ten to fifteen business days, I would have my response back.

While waiting for my answer, I started getting my supporting documentation in order. Most district applications that I looked at required three current letters of recommendation. I requested, and got, letters from my former boss at the call center, the principal at my favorite school, and the substitute teacher coordinator at my favorite district. I rewrote my résumé and updated my work history and my list of references to emphasize my work experience in education. I picked up an employment application for one school district, downloaded a second, and filled out online applications for two others. My attempt to download an application for a fifth district was unsuccessful due to technical problems on their web site. I began, little by little, to get my proverbial ducks in a row.

Then, on Thursday, July 9th, I got a letter in the mail from the state Office of Education. My ARL request had been approved! I was in business. Over the following weekend I finished organizing my stuff, filled out the applications I had, made copies of my ARL letter and my letters of recommendation, and printed out copies of my résumé. When Monday morning came around, I was all dressed up and ready to go.

I hit the road around 8:45 a.m. and headed north. My first stop was the Davis School District office, where I submitted my completed application and supporting documentation. The HR secretary reviewed my paperwork and confirmed that I had everything they were looking for. She said that she didn't know if they were screening ARL candidates at this time, but promised me a phone call if they were. I thanked her for her time. One down, four to go.

From there I mixed a little pleasure with the day's business. I was already halfway to Ogden, and not having seen Lord Mhoram in several weeks, I drove up and spent an hour or so with him. It was nice to just sit and chat and catch up with each other and our families. Good times.

Mhoram had to go to his job then, and I had to get back to mine. I drove back to SLC and made my way to the downtown offices of the Salt Lake City School District. Again, I turned in my application and other information. The secretary there stamped my packet and told me I'd receive a card in the mail once everything had been processed. Sure enough, I got a post card two days later. That's all I've heard so far. Two down.

It was just a short drive from there down State Street to the Granite School District offices. GSD is the district in which I've done the vast majority of my substitute teaching, and the offices are in the same complex as my favorite school. I had already submitted an application electronically, so I was there just to turn in supporting documentation. The HR coordinator for secondary schools, with whom I'd talked a couple of times before, thanked me for bringing in my stuff and told me she'd get the information out to the principals. Best news so far. Three down.

The Jordan School District office was my next stop. The Jordan District is only about half as large this year as it was last year; the eastern half of the district voted to secede and create a new district, the Canyons District (more about which momentarily). Part of the change involved moving the offices to a new location, a beautiful new building near the Jordan Landing commercial park. Anyway, I arrived at the office and told the secretary I was there to apply for a secondary teaching position. She put introduced me to one of the HR people over secondary teachers, and I explained that I wanted to apply for a position but had been unable to download an application from the district's web site. She were able to print off the application I'd submitted to Teachers-Teachers.com for another district and add the rest of my documentation to it. Then she asked if I'd be available to come in for a screening interview on Friday. Better yet. We scheduled the appointment for 10:30 a.m. on Friday, and I thanked her for all her help. On the way out, I also thanked the secretary for her assistance. Four down, one more to go.

My final stop of the day was the aforementioned Canyons School District. This was the district from which the HR Director I'd met at that Professional Network Meeting on June 8th had come. I also knew from Teachers-Teachers.com that they had posted openings for Chemistry/Biology teachers in two of the district's four high schools. So I was optimistic. I had a little difficulty finding the place; they had also had to establish new headquarters, which ended up being in one of the district's elementary schools (which, from all appearances, is no longer going to be used as a school). I talked to the secretary and told her I had submitted an application online and that I was there to submit additional documentation. She paged someone from HR, and in a few moments I was talking to a lady in the secondary department. She told me that the person I needed to talk to was out for the week, but that I could come in for a screening interview at 10:00 a.m. on Monday. I accepted, of course, and then asked if they were still looking for someone for those two positions. She said she didn't know, but added that they had done a lot of hiring in the previous couple of weeks.

That was the last one. I went home, having put in a pretty good day's work for someone without a real job.

So, to summarize my day's travels:
* From our house to the Davis School District headquarters: 25.9 miles.
* To Lord Mhoram's home: 17.9 miles
* To the Salt Lake School District headquarters: 33.9 miles.
* To the Granite School District headquarters: 4.0 miles.
* To the Jordan School District headquarters: 13.1 miles.
* To the Canyons School District headquarters: 12.9 miles.
* Back home: 10.4 miles.
Total distance: 118.1 miles^†, give or take, in a period of about 5½ hours. Five districts visited, two interviews scheduled. Fair enough.

Wednesday afternoon brought a welcome surprise. One of the schools in the Granite School District—the same school at which I'd substituted for six weeks this spring, in fact—called to ask if I could come in to interview for a Chemistry position the following morning at 10:00. Nancy had her sixteen-week doctor's appointment scheduled at exactly that time, so I asked if I could come in earlier. Sounding rather surprised that I'd actually be willing to come in early, the secretary told me the Vice Principal could meet with me at 8:30 a.m. I told her I'd be there.

So I made my way to East Side High School (not the school's real name) early the following morning. I was met by both of the school's Vice Principals and invited to come into the office. As it turns out, I interviewed for the same job I'd substituted for in March and April. That teacher had taken a higher-paying administrative position in another district, so they were looking for someone who could teach Honors and AP Chemistry. One of the questions they asked me was whether I would feel comfortable teaching Chemistry at that level. I assured them it would be no problem at all. I spent about half an hour with them, and they seemed to like my responses to their questions (even if though I felt like I was babbling a bit at times). I left feeling very confident about how I'd performed during the interview. Still, I knew they were interviewing at least two other candidates. They said they'd be making the final decision on either Friday or Monday. I was cautiously optimistic.

Friday morning's interview was rather interesting. First, because I neglected to bring (or even look at) the reminder note I'd written on Monday, I arrived at 10:00 instead of my scheduled time of 10:30. Second, when I got there, there was already a guy sitting in the lobby. We started to talk, and I found out that he was the 10:00 appointment and that he was seeking a job teaching...you guessed it, Chemistry. He mentioned that he had been at another interview the previous day...you guessed it, at East Side High School. Freaky. Anyway, we had about eight minutes to chat before he was called in, and we talked about our respective job searches. He, too, had graduated in Chemistry and was looking for a position through ARL. We compared notes and commiserated a little. He's a nice guy. I hope he finds something he'll like.

As I waited for my turn in the interviewing room, the secretary (a different one than I'd met on Monday) remarked on how patient I was. I responded with something like, "Well, if you don't have the patience to wait for an interview, you'll never survive in a classroom." She agreed.

Anyway, my turn came at last. The nice HR lady spent about half an hour with me. She spent the first ten minutes pitching the district to me: talking about the schools, the neighborhoods, the rapid growth the area was experiencing, the district's compensation rates and benefits packages for teachers, and so on. The next fifteen minutes were spent in a Q&A, where she asked me about everything from education philosophy to classroom management to how to control unruly students. And in the last five minutes, she told me that the district wasn't hiring any secondary science teachers right now, but that they would keep my application on file for up to two years, and that if anything opened up, they'd refer my information to the principal(s) in question. I thanked her for her time and drove home. An eventful interview, to be sure, but not quite what I'd hoped for. Still, I had that screening interview with the Canyons district on Monday morning to look forward to, so I couldn't complain.

Finally, my week's efforts ended on a definite upswing. I got a call from the secretary at East Side High School on Friday afternoon. The Principal, who had been at a conference all week, wanted to meet with me on Monday afternoon. That's right, loyal reader(s). I've been called in for a second interview!

So it's been a long and winding road, both literally and figuratively. Where will it lead? I don't know. Time (and patience) will tell, I suppose. Any and all prayers, well-wishes, and/or positive vibes would be greatly appreciated. I'll let you know how it turns out.

And now, if you'll pardon me, I have some thank-you notes to write.

--
^†Mileage estimates via Mapquest.

Pics of the Week: Goodbye, Dilworth

As I mentioned in January, our Ward met in three different chapels in 2008. The first of these, the venerable Texas Street chapel, has long since been demolished. The second of the three, affectionately known as the Dilworth chapel (named for the school across the street from it, Dilworth Elementary) was demolished within the last month. Unlike the Texas Street building, we managed to get some pictures of the Dilworth building before it was completely gone.



Looking eastward from 2000 East, you can see some of the foundation and other concrete elements that were torn up in the demolition. You can also see, on the far right, the core of the Stake building that sat adjacent to the Dilworth chapel. The new Stake Center will be built around that core.



This picture looks to the west from 2100 East. You can see the parking lot and some of the foundations from where the various Bishops' and clerks' offices were located. You can still see the outline of a large basement room close to the parking lot. That room, if I recall correctly, is where the Scouts used to meet.

It will be interesting to see the new Stake Center as it takes shape. The Dilworth chapel was a unique and charming building, and (as I understand) a personal favorite of President Hinckley. Unfortunately, it just wasn't very well suited to a Ward the size of ours. The new Stake Center will be more functional, if less aesthetically interesting.

The Long and Winding Road, Part I

Most readers will probably remember when I got a job teaching math at a local tutoring service a few months ago. Most of you won't know what has happened since then, though. That's what today's post is all about.

The tutoring job I started in April went really well for about five weeks. At the end of May, beginning of June, some of my students started to discontinue their visits. This was not unexpected; the school year was ending. No problem, though. The company offers tutoring over the summer, and in the daytime, to boot. So the first week of June would be the last week of teaching evenings. That Tuesday I talked to the director to find out exactly what my schedule was going to be for the summer session. She said that things were still a little up in the air and that schedules hadn't been finalized yet. She only works in the Sandy center on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons, so I agreed to check in with her in another couple of days.

Thursday evening came, and I saw no sign of the director. No big deal, she comes in on Fridays too, sometimes. But I didn't see her on Friday, either. Now I was concerned. I asked the administrative assistant about my schedule for the following week, and she didn't know anything. She told me to call on Monday morning. I wasn't satisfied with that answer, and asked for the director's home number, which—surprisingly—she gave me. Once I got the director on the phone, the issue was quickly resolved.

The reason she hadn't given me a schedule for summer session was that I wasn't going to have one.

Blame the lousy economy, I guess, but there weren't enough students enrolled for the (admittedly rather expensive) service for summer session to justify having two teachers. And since the other teacher had the edge in seniority (and superior content knowledge, frankly), she got the students. I got an unexpected summer vacation.

Without a summer assignment with the tutoring center, and with substitute teaching opportunities not easy to come by between early June and late August, I was effectively unemployed.

This, as it turns out, is where the story begins to get interesting.

For several weeks before this, I had been visiting LDS Employment Resource Services. I'd actually found the tutoring job through LDS Employment. During one of my visits there, the career coach I'd been working with had taken a look at my résumé and referred me to the service's weekly Professional Networking Meeting. I'd never actually gone to this meeting, but with the entire following week now unexpectedly available, I decided to go.

I arrived at the meeting around 8:30 on Monday morning, June 8th. I filled out a couple of forms and found a seat with around a hundred other potential job seekers. We heard a presentation from a local staffing agency representative and an inspirational message from one of the Employment Center staff. We were introduced to representatives from several local employers. Then we started hearing briefly from the various job seekers. Each of us did a "Me In 30 Seconds" presentation. (They put all the newbies, myself included, on the far end of the room so that we could hear other people's statements before having to do one ourselves.) After giving my "Me In 30 Seconds" statement, I headed back to my seat, pretty pleased with what I'd managed to put together.

Shortly—seconds, literally—after sitting down someone came over to talk to me. It was someone from one of the local school districts. She gave me a business card from the head of Human Resources from the district. She told me he'd like to talk to me.

I chatted with him for a few minutes after the meeting, and he gave me an idea where to start my job search in earnest. One important thing he did was to point me in the direction of Teachers-Teachers.com, a site that a lot of districts (including his) use for recruitment. He said to submit an application through that site, then to e-mail him so that he would know to look for it.

After that, I made my way upstairs to one of the small group meetings. In that meeting we talked about networking and power statements, as well as a new style for résumés. As I sat there and worked on my own résumé, one of the volunteers came over to help me. We talked a little about my experiences and education, and then she asked me the big question: What did I really want to do? I told her I was working toward becoming an educator, that I had a Bachelor of Science in Chemistry and was working on a Master of Arts in Teaching. She asked me if I knew about the state's Alternative Route to Licensure, a way for people who are not licensed as teachers to gain a provisional teaching license while they work to fulfill the requirements for full licensure. I told her that I knew about it and that I had even applied once, but given up pursuing it in favor of graduate school.

And then she told me something I had not known, something I wish I had known a long time ago: I could qualify for ARL while I was enrolled in a postgraduate licensure program. I had no idea.

If I had gained nothing else from my morning's investment of time and attention, this one nugget of information would have been more than worth it. There was a way that I could start teaching—now, potentially. This changed everything.

And that's enough for one night I think. More on the story tomorrow, Sunday at the latest.

--

And now you can move on to Part II.

Joke of the Day

Compliments of Lord Mhoram.

Several university students in a Logic & Reasoning class are given the assignment to prove that all odd numbers are prime. Their responses are as follows:

Mathematics major: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, and the rest by induction.
Physics major: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is an experimental error, 11 is prime...
Chemistry major: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, let's publish!
Engineering major: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is a good approximation...
Economics major: 2 is prime, 4 is prime...
English major: 1 is prime, 2 is prime, 3 is prime, 4 is prime...

Top 5 On Friday: Week 230

Brought to you, as always, by The Music Memoirs.

Top 5 Rock Couples (In this case where both parts of a couple are in the music industry)

5. Paul & Linda McCartney
There had to be a Beatles couple on my list, and it wasn't going to be John and Yoko.

4. Amy Grant & Vince Gill
Amy and Vince worked together on a video in 1994. Amy divorced her husband in 1999 and married Vince the next year. The contemporary Christian music community was not pleased. To be fair, though, Vince also divorced his wife in 1998.

3. Elvis Costello & Diana Krall
The marriage that's been giving nerdy music-boys hope since 2003.

2. Tim McGraw & Faith Hill
They're just two beautiful people who happen to sell millions of records.

1. Benny Andersson & Anni-Frid Lyngstad, Björn Ulvaeus & Agnetha Fältskog
These may not be household names, but in the 70's and early 80's, these two couples—collectively known as ABBA—owned pop music.

Top 5 On Friday: Week 229

From The Music Memoirs.

There's been so many celebrity deaths lately which brings me to the top 5:
Top 5 songs or albums from "The Dead Rockers Society" (that means albums or songs by dead people)

As usual, I'm going to go with albums.

5. Enjoy Every Sandwich: The Songs of Warren Zevon

To be honest, I didn't even know who Warren Zevon was until I stumbled across this album at the library. I was amazed at the number of songs I recognized. This tribute album features acts as diverse as Don Henley, Adam Sandler, Steve Earle, Reckless Kelly, Jackson Browne, Bonnie Raitt, Bruce Springsteen, and the Wallflowers. And that's just on the first six tracks.

4. Songs for Swingin' Lovers! by Frank Sinatra

"You Make Me Feel So Young". "Too Marvelous for Words". "Old Devil Moon". "Pennies From Heaven". "I've Got You Under My Skin". "Makin' Whoopee". "Anything Goes". And so forth. What more needs to be said?

3. An Evening with John Denver by John Denver

I grew up listening to this album. Even if you don't like his musical style or his politics, you can't deny that he had a way with an audience. I would love to have seen him in concert once.

2. Genius Loves Company by Ray Charles

Just look at the guest list: Norah Jones, Elton John, B.B. King, Johnny Mathis, Gladys Knight, Willie Nelson, Diana Krall, James Taylor, Bonnie Raitt, Van Morrison, Michael McDonald, and Natalie Cole. Wow. Ray was one of the most prolific, most versatile, and most respected artists in the business, and this last album reaffirms his legacy.

1. At Folsom Prison by Johnny Cash

Johnny Cash is a legend in music, and "At Folsom Prison" is a big part of the reason why. This album rejuvenated his career.


Also, let me present my Dead Rockers Society All-Stars:
Lead Vocals: Freddie Mercury (Queen), Brad Delp (Boston)
Guitars: George Harrison (The Beatles), Terry Kath (Chicago)
Bass: Louis Satterfield (Earth Wind & Fire)
Keyboards: Richard Wright (Pink Floyd)
Drums: Jeff Porcaro (Toto)

Imagine having the seven of them alive and together in a studio for a month. How amazing would that album be?