In a
Fark.com discussion thread about the whole "hostile and abusive mascots" issue, someone raised the point that now it's just a matter of time until someone (PETA
*, maybe) decides that the use of animal nicknames is also hostile and abusive, and animal mascots will also be outlawed.
This got me to thinking. Having looked at the various mascots and team nicknames that are out there, I've found literally dozens that could be considered offensive for various reasons. So I present here, as a public service, a comprehensive list of offensive nicknames for teams in major North American professional sports. This includes the NFL, NBA, NHL, CFL, MLS, and MLB.
**(There was no reason to include any college teams, of course, since the NCAA has already called for the removal of the most offensive mascots. Those beyond Native American names will certainly be following soon.)
The List:Kansas City Chiefs, Cleveland Indians, Atlanta Braves, Chicago BlackhawksOffensive to Native Americans
Washington RedskinsExtremely offensive to Native Americans
Edmonton EskimosOffensive to Native Canadians
Boston CelticsOffensive to Gaelic Americans
Dallas Cowboys, Houston Texans, Dallas Mavericks, San Antonio Spurs, Portland Trail Blazers, Texas Rangers, Calgary Stampeders, Ottawa Renegades, Saskatchewan RoughridersSupports those who oppress Native Americans
Miami Dolphins, Baltimore Ravens, Indianapolis Colts, Denver Broncos, Philadelphia Eagles, Chicago Bears, Detroit Lions, Atlanta Falcons, Arizona Cardinals, Seattle Seahawks, St. Louis Rams, Chicago Bulls, Milwaukee Bucks, Atlanta Hawks, Charlotte Bobcats, Memphis Grizzlies, New Orleans Hornets, Baltimore Orioles, Toronto Blue Jays, Florida Marlins, Philadelphia Phillies, Chicago Cubs, St. Louis Cardinals, Arizona Diamondbacks, Pittsburgh Penguins, Boston Bruins, Anaheim Mighty Ducks, Phoenix Coyotes, San Jose Sharks, Chivas USA, Hamilton Tiger-Cats, British Columbia LionsPromotes exploitation of animals
Toronto Maple Leafs, Atlanta ThrashersPromotes exploitation of plants
Green Bay Packers, New Jersey NetsPromotes the harvesting and consumption of animals
Cincinnati Bengals, Jacksonville Jaguars, Carolina Panthers, Minnesota Timberwolves, Detroit Tigers, Florida PanthersPromotes exploitation of endangered species
Toronto RaptorsPromotes exploitation of an extinct species
New England Patriots, New York Yankees, Washington Nationals, Montreal Canadiens, Vancouver Canucks, New England RevolutionPromotes jingoistic nationalism
Sacramento Kings, Kansas City Royals, Los Angeles KingsPromotes oppressive nondemocratic forms of government
Philadelphia 76ers, Ottawa Senators, Washington CapitalsSupports government bureaucracy
New York Jets, Golden State Warriors, Winnipeg Blue BombersPromotes war as a non-peaceful means of resolving conflict
Edmonton Oilers, Detroit Pistons, Indiana Pacers, Seattle SuperSonicsPromotes the use of non-renewable fossil fuels
Oakland Raiders, Minnesota Vikings, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Los Angeles Clippers, Seattle Mariners, Pittsburgh Pirates, Toronto ArgonautsPromotes looting, piracy, and crime on the high seas
Cincinnati RedsPromotes communism, also potentially offensive to Native Americans
Buffalo Bills, San Diego ChargersPromotes excessive consumer debt
Tennessee Titans, New York Giants, San Francisco GiantsOffensive to short people; also potentially offensive to tall people
New Orleans Saints, Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, San Diego PadresOffensive to atheists
Carolina Hurricanes, Tampa Bay Lightning, Colorado Avalanche, Miami Heat, San Jose Earthquakes'Acts of God', so also offensive to atheists
Orlando Magic, Washington Wizards, Kansas City WizardsPromotes study of the occult
New Jersey Devils, Tampa Bay Devil RaysPromotes Satanism
Pittsburgh Steelers, San Francisco 49ers, Denver NuggetsPromotes environmentally-destructive mining
Houston Rockets, Phoenix Suns, Houston Astros, Philadelphia Flyers, Dallas Stars, New York/New Jersey MetroStars, Los Angeles GalaxyPromotes the diversion of funds from necessary social programs to space exploration
Calgary Flames, Chicago FirePromotes arson
Cleveland Cavaliers, Buffalo SabresEncourages the carrying of weapons
Los Angeles (originally Brooklyn) DodgersEncourages jaywalking
Milwaukee BrewersContributes to alcoholism
Utah Jazz, St. Louis BluesPromotes musical elitism
Boston Red Sox, Chicago White Sox, Columbus Blue JacketsPromotes fashion elitism; may also contribute to jingoistic nationalism
Well, you get the idea. It's amazing how crass, uncaring, and generally insensitive we sports fans are, isn't it? Shame on us.
It's a good thing we have the NCAA to show us the way.
--
*In this context, PETA does
not stand for "People Eating Tasty Animals". Sorry, Curtis.
**I haven't included the WNBA because I figured there's no way a women's sports league could be using offensive nicknames or mascots. They're so much more sophisticated and sensitive than we men are.